Sex makes us uneasy in some situations. Obviously many people like sex and have no problem saying so. However, a very different issue is finding yourself in a situation in which sexual intercourse is imminent. There are people who in this type of case feel a very strong blush that prevents them from enjoying the sexual act. That’s what recently happened to actor Robert Pattinson when he had to do his fiery scene in the back of the car with Julianne Moore in his movie, «Maps to the stars.»
The psychologist Carlos de la Cruz has taken the pulse of our society. It has detected a dozen new triggers that block the normal expression of desire and the joy of sex.
Sex makes us uneasy
- Sexuality has been filled with many «haves». Having to measure up, having to have sex, having to like oral sex, etc.
- Too much ego. The sensation of counting leaves you exposed with the consequent risk of being below average. Sexually there is still a lot of sense of competition.
- «The much you have, the much you worth». We live a sexuality very marked by quantity and little by quality; with unrealistic and practical standards that are not always to our liking.
- Too exposed to lights and stenographers. Intimacy logic tells us that it does not seem sensible to always talk about our erotic relationships.
- The naked body raises the need to compare. If comparisons are always hateful, more so when they are anatomical and dictated by the canons of pornography.
- The man is becoming much more modest than ever in his emotional aspects.
- We insist on talking about sexuality from the danger and little of the possibilities of pleasure, satisfaction and encounter.
- We pay more attention to a small sexuality, of intercourse and genitalia, than to the sexuality that we could write with a capital letter: bodies, pleasures, desires and diversity. Parents avoid the subject on many occasions and when it comes it is done from a pathological and scary perspective.
- The staging of sexuality from the media and leisure transmits pressure and, above all, the pressure of not having to be ashamed. Therefore, we do not recognize this feeling of modesty and we try to hide it, even if the body betrays us.
- A misunderstood naturalness. We should be able to show ourselves as we are. From the frankness to be able to say: «I feel uncomfortable naked», «I am nervous», «I am ashamed of the light on», «It is the first time».